when the world becomes too much, here's how to get to sleep

because rest is essential.

As I sit in my bathtub with music humming in the background, I’m thinking about the sleep I will get tonight, and I’m over the moon. Simultaneously, my thoughts keep returning to the same question…

What about the girls who want a good night’s rest, too?

If you haven’t already figured it out, I’m a sucker for my kind. Women. Black women, especially. And, knowing that some struggle to keep their eyes closed because the weight of everything is far too heavy.

There was a time in my life when my eyeballs were glued to the ceiling at UNGODLY hours. I flipped from side to side countless times. The volume of my thoughts was so loud I heard nothing else. And, my emotions were so high that tears drenched the mattress beneath me.

The truth is, hardships don’t have a tax bracket. A type. A name. A demographic. A preference. Neither does stress. Anxiety. Or weariness.

I know you get weary. I know your heart aches from uncertainty. I know your mind wanders to places you wish it would return from. I know you’re tired. And, I know a good night’s rest won’t save you from life, but it will help you fight the battles of life a bit more rested, energized, and prepared.

So, this one is to you.

I have thirty minutes before lights out, so I pray this post finds you and the words resonate. Here are some things I’ve done in moments I’ve felt like things were falling apart when truly they were just falling together.

Verbally release all that’s holding onto you.

Maybe through affirmations. Maybe through prayer. Maybe through denouncing. Maybe through meditation. Maybe through song.

Add L-Theanine to your nightly routine.

It’s natural and beneficial for those struggling to collect themselves and their thoughts. It’s known to help with rest, relaxation, and relief.

Take a dark shower.

No direct light. A candle works. Release your eyes from the stress that continuous light causes. And, while you’re at it… Close your eyes. Scream if you need to. Cry if you need to. Hug yourself if you need to. Let it all come down.

Settle in the bath after a shower.

Bubbles if you have them. Keep that candle going. Take a second to pause. To breathe. To acknowledge where you are in the moment. Declutter your headspace.

Have a cup of tea.

Specifically, something with lavender, chamomile, passionflower, and valerian root. Your body will naturally begin to enter rest mode.

Calm your body.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Reflect on a time you felt your best to remind yourself of what goodness feels and looks like for you. Stay in that moment for as long as you can.

Lotion your body —from head to toe.

Moisturizers that have magnesium inside of them work wonders. So do moisturizers with melatonin or lavender or chamomile. Don’t rush this process. Truly feel your skin. Your pressure points. The places you’re tense. Massage away the knots and smooth out the kinks as best you can.

Put on something comfortable.

Something comforting. Whether it is your favorite t-shirt. Your grandmother’s robe. Your silk sleep dress. Or nothing at all. Whatever makes you feel best, wear it.

White noises, nature sounds, sleep sounds, or soft tunes.

These sounds are important. They help you tune out the thoughts and worries circulating in your head… keeping you awake. They were created to induce sleep and promote relaxation. They reduce anxiety and significantly improve the quality of sleep.

Silence notifications.

Schedule your focus mode so your notifications are automatically silenced each night. Most things can’t wait til the next day.

Avoid scrolling.

Don’t fall into the vicious cycle of scrolling. It’s daunting. It’s pure doom. And, sleep will find you much later if you fall into the trap social media has sat before us. Program your apps to lock after a certain hour. Because, at some point of the day you have to tune the world and their millions of opinions, complaints, theories, altered photos, AI images, Chat captions, and lies out. This is the perfect time.

(Optional but suggested) Masturbate.

Yes. Touch yourself if the moment permits. Your body will be forced to release all that’s holding onto you. Your climax will be the quickest transition. One minute you’re active and the next you’re jumping from your sleep because your snores happen to scare you.

Goodnight. Sleep well.

grey.

Note: This piece is unedited. My eyes are crossing, and my bedtime is here. Will republish tomorrow.